I’m sorry to hear what happened. Clearly that person was and is a criminal playing with your emotions. I urge you to let go of any remaining interest you have in such a person who is not worthy of your love. Sometimes we want so much to believe and give someone a chance, and have in mind the stories and the proverbs, and then we find out that we were taken advantage of. The only good thing about it is that you are now still at a point where you can let go of it and move on. In our opinion, no decent person would ever ask you for money shortly after meeting, period. Please read all of our blog entries carefully, and be sure to adamantly follow the rule strictly to never send money to anyone you have not met in person. If you wish to be charitable, please make a donation to the Red Cross or the United Way or your local congregation.

If you are serious to meet someone, sending money is not going to improve your chances of meeting a mature person, but rather reduce your chances of it. Save your money, plan a trip to the Philippines, and please immediately report any member who ever asks you for money, and we will suspend them immediately. Asking for money directly or indirectly is a clear violation of our terms of service, it’s a breach of common decency, and it’s the mark of a criminal who has fallen for the temptations, not a friend who you could ever count on.

I encourage you to slow down, let go of what happened, and then take your time to wait until you meet a person who respects you more than did that person. You’re clearly a caring, supportive man, and I’m sure that the Lord has something in mind for you.

Peter (along with Jen, site owners)

Welcome to the site. I’m sorry that we don’t have data to give you a precise past success rate. We actually just opened the site this year.

About disingenuous persons, to be honest we were caught off guard ourselves by some of the predatory individuals who attempted to take advantage of others through our site. We clearly had to make a choice when we began to notice that what was going on at other dating sites, was also spreading to ours. We responded by more carefully screening profiles of new members and also by making it easier for members to report abuse of the system by others. We believe that (with the help of many members) that we have been successful in significantly reducing the percentage of disingenuous members.

I’ll be continuing to write blog entries over time to help our members navigate this somewhat complicated territory of meeting Filipinas. However, let me offer a few tips here and now. Don’t forget the basics! First of all, you should think about your values and your lifestyle. If you like hunting and gardening and building your own house, you probably won’t have much in common with someone who has never left the city. Or if you love philosophical discussions in the city and have no interest in dirt or farm animals, you might not have much in common with someone who grew up planting rice all day who might not even have good English grammar and vocabulary. Equally, what is the role of God in your life, and how open are you to someone who might have a different relationship with God? One of the silliest mistakes some one can make is to fall in love with a picture. Those brief infatuations rarely result in lasting mutual satisfaction. Do you agree? So the first thing is to remember is your own values, and to set the pictures aside and communicate with another person to see whether those values are shared.

When it comes to dating sites regarding the Philippines, I also advise you not to fall in love over the internet. My recommendation to you is to get to know several people over the internet, and then to meet them in person, before falling in love with any of them. Don’t forget: you are in the driver’s seat. You should have a firm rule that you don’t send money to anyone you have never met in person, and you should promptly let anyone you chat with know that this is your policy. The sincere ladies will not be offended. You should also have a firm rule that you should insist on using webcam chat from time to time. You should look carefully to see that the person typing is the person sitting at the computer and chatting, and you should watch to know whether they are just chatting with you or trying to carry on multiple chat conversations. We are almost ready to launch our video chat feature on our site (if you are an upgraded member and would like to try it, just let me know and I’ll add you to the access list to help us test it).

If you have any questions or concerns about a specific member, write to us. Many of our members do write to us with questions, and together we are able to understand better when to trust and when to be cautious.

Take your time. The first person to write back might be a professional internet chat scammer (if one slipped through our profile review). Sometimes the sincere and professional ladies can only go to the internet cafe every few days or once a week. Be patient, write to many people, don’t be shy, and enjoy the process of learning about Christian Filipinas.

Jen

All the best

Rob